Emmett goes to Summer School
by TwilightFanatic01
Summary: UHOH! Emmett didn't do so well during the school year, and now he has to take summer school! What crazy things will he do during this time? Especially when one of his classes is... *Gulp*... Home Ec? Please R&R. Rated T just in case.
1. The Letter

**Disclaimer: Unfortunately I do not own Twilight, or any of the amazing characters, but I do own this plot.**

**The Letter**

**(Emmett's POV)**

It was a beatiful sunny day, and there was only a week of school left. Ahhh, no more pencils, no more books, and no more teacher's dirty looks.

This is my all time favorite rhyme to sing once it was close to the end of the school year, and man did it drive Eddie up the wall. I was thinking about all the free time I'll have, especially time to play and feed the human, as I went to check the mailbox.

_"Hmmm, that's interesting."_ I thought to myself. I had gotten a letter from Forks High. Probably grades, well bad grades are nothing new. No biggie. On my way back up to the house I looked through the rest of the mail. Bills, bills, bills, a letter to Carlisle, an invitation for Esme, and a shopping advertisement for Alice. Nothing interesting.

I got to the house, where I opened the envelope from my school.

"NOOOOOO!!" I yelled at the top of my lungs.

"Emmett! What's wrong?" Carlisle and Esme ask together. "Oh, let us guess. You got your report card back, and made all F's and maybe a few C's and D's?"

"Not only that! I have to go to summer school!" I was so devastated. Man, Edward was going to leave for a few days to hunt, and I was going to use that time to play with Bella. Aww man. This sucks.

"When does it start?" Carlisle asked.

"In three days." Today was Friday, so Monday was when I would be sentanced to three weeks of studying.

"What classes?" Esme asked.

"Umm, Trig, World History, Biology Two, and... Oh no! There is no way on earth."

"What? What is it Emmet?" Carlisle and Esme asked together.

"I.. I've been assigned to home ec!"

"Oh, that's wonderful Emmett! Now instead of blowing my kitchen up, you can help me bake and cook. Oh this will be such fun."

"Wh-what?! Are you insane! I am not going to take a cooking class with a bunch of prissy girls."

"Cooking is a very serious skill. Many men do it. For example, Gordon Ramsey." **(A/N by the way is an amazing cook, he is the host of my all time favorite cooking show, Hell's Kitchen!! :D :D)**Esme stated.

"Yeah, but but me? Me in a kitchen? Nu-uh, nooo way. They can't make me. I'm gonna call the school right now."

I was headed to the phone just as I heard _his_ voice.

"So... Emmet? Heard you have to take summer school. Well, at least this way my precious Bella will be safe from you."

I turned to face my strikingly handsome brother. Edward was a dream to every girl who laid eyes on him (or in that case, anything _else _that was laid on him. Ha ha ha.)

"Yes dear brother, I do have summer school. With very manly classes."

"Yea, Home Ec. is _really_ manly. So what are ya gonna do? Bake cookies. Hey, who knows, maybe you'll be really lucky and become the new Aunt Jemima, or I mean _Uncle_."

I glowered at Edward, creating a rumbling growl deep in my chest.

"Back off Eddie. I still have three days, plenty of time to have... some fun... with your precious human."

"You wouldn't"

"I would" I threatened.

"Ok, I'll leave you alone if you leave Bella alone? Kay?"

"Alright. Now, If you'll excuse me, I have an important phone call to make to our _wonderful_ school."

I finally got Edward to leave the room so I could call and work this out with the principle.

"Hello, Forks High school. Darla speaking."

Oh great. The new secretary, man this was gonna be just _peachy._

"Umm, yes. This is Emmett Cullen, and I just recieved a letter stating that I have summer school, and one of my classes is Home Ec. Is there any way I can get that changed?"

"Hmmm, Emmett Cullen." The secretary muttered to herself. "Ahhh, yes here we are. I see that you are assigned to Home Ec., but there is no way we are able to switch that."

"Wh-what? Why?" I stuttered.

"Well, you see all the other Encore classes were taken up, and you had to take at least one along with the classes you failed. I'm sorry, but Home Ec was the only one left."

"So, can't you replace me for someone else in like... oh I dunno... woodworking, Metal working? Anything but Home Ec?"

"No, I'm sorry. That was the best we could do."

"Well, apparantly your best isn't good enough!" With that I hung the phone up. I felt bad for the old lady, but today was a _real_ crappy day. Tommorow should be even better when Bella finds out.

Someone help me now.

**Well, I hope you guys are liking this story so far. If you like this story please review so I know to write more. Please be nice, this is the only story I have written without anyone's help (My friend and I wrote about three others.). So PLEASE REVIEW! Constructive criticism is welcomed. Anything to help me become a better writer is great. Also, if you have any ideas, or are offended by anything, please don't hesistate to PM me, I am very friendly! **

**Peace, love and chicken grease!**


	2. Bella Finds Out

**Disclaimer: I, unfortunately, do not own Twilight. Yet. Mwahahahahah. Or sadly its characters.**

**Ok guys. I gotta clear one thing up. In chapter one in the first sentance, Emmett said that there was only a week of school left, well, I meant for it to be the first day of summer break. My bad. Hope you enjoy!! :D**

**Bella finds out**

**(Emmett's POV)**

"Edward, do we have to tell Bella about me having to go to summer school?" I pleaded

"Yes Emmett. Bella needs to know that she will be safe from you for the first three weeks of break." Edward replied.

"Ughh. Fine, but we don't have to tell her about the Home Ec. class do we?"

"Oh, I dunno. Bella may enjoy hearing that for three weeks, you are gonna be baking cakes and cookies."

"EDDIE! I mean _Edward_. Please don't! If you don't tell her I swear on my grave, that I will not play with Bella, throw her out of a window, play hide and seek, or play catch Bella, or get Bella drunk, for the rest of the summer. I swear on my grave."

"Hmmm, that is tempting Emmett. _Very_ tempting. Ok, I'll take that swear, and if you even lay a finger on Bella, I'll make sure that the coffin I put you in is deep under ground so that no one, and I repeat, no one, can hear you. Understood."

"Y-y-yes Edward. Anything you say." I stammered.

We walked for a while in silence, but soon enough we came up to her front door.

"Don't forget." Edward muttered under his breath.

"You either." I whispered back

'Ding dong' went the doorbell.

I could hear Bella's distinct footsteps, quiet as a mouse, come up to the other side of the door.

"Edward!" She shouted. "I thought you were going to hunt today! What happened?"

"Oh, I'll go later, but I first had to come and see you."Edward said as he leaned into kiss Bella.

But before he could do that, I jumped at vampire speed and picked Bella up in my arms and gave her a giant bear hug.

"Em-Emmett. Please let me go" Bella gasped. "I-I can't breathe."

Then before I could let her loose, I was being held even tighter by someone else.

"You swore. You swore on your grave." Edward breathed into my ear.

"Which I technically do not have yet dear brother."

"Yet." Edward threatened. "Any other reasons why I shouldn't kill you right now?"

"Uhh, yes. Yes indeed there is. When I was rambling off what I wouldn't do to Bella, I never said I wouldn't give her huge bear hugs." Hmmph. That should stump Edward now.

"Ok, I guess I don't have any reason to kill you. Yet." Edward said as he went over to stand by Bella.

"Bella love?" Edward asked in a silky voice. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine Edward. Please, don't hurt Emmett. He was just excited to see me." Bella begged.

"Hmm. You know Bells, you are too nice for your own good. He could have crushed you, which would have crushed me, then i would have to crush Emmett."

"See. Then no one is happy" Bella replied.

Edward just rolled his eyes and leaned down to kiss Bella passionately on the lips.

"Okay, okay you guys. Can you please get a room. I don't need any disturbing images going through my mind."

"Okay Emmett. We will." Edward answered with a smirk, and picked Bella up into his arms and ran at vampire speed up to her room.

Luckily for them, Charlie was away on a fishing trip and wouldn't be back until tomorrow evening.

**(Edward's POV)**

As we got into her room, I laid Bella down on the bed. Now is when I should tell her about Emmett, but she is so beautiful. I had to stare for just a few more seconds.

Well, so much for that. Because right when I told myself that, Bella jumped right into my arms and kissed me so fiercly that I had to pull away.

"Bella, behave." I told her.

"It's not fair Edward. I _want_ you. The wedding is too far off."

"Silly Bella. Our wedding is in a month."

"Ok, a month. Much to long to wait." And with that she started kissing me again.

"Bella." I said once more. "Please wait. For me." I pleaded her, giving Bella my best smile.

"Oh fine." She pouted.

"Besides. I have something to tell you."

"Really? What is it?" She asked, with eagerness in her eyes.

"Well, turns out that Emmett is starting summer school Monday, tomorrow, and will not bug you for the three weeks he is gone."

"Wow. Three weeks without Emmett. You know, we should make the most of it."

"Yes. But I have other news too."

"Really?"

"Mmm hmm. One of the classes Emmett has to take is... Home Ec."

I can't even describe the look on Bella's face. It was scrunched up in some wierd way.

"Emmett? Home Ec.?" Bella gasped.

"Bella love. Please calm down. I didn't mean to upset you."

With that she let out a hearty laugh, that shook the walls.

"Emmett... in Home... Ec?... much to... funny." Bella gasped with laughter, trying to catch her breath. "Whew. I can't believe this. What does he think?"

"Well, he was very upset. He even called the school and talked to some new secretary named Darla."

"Oh wow. Well, he is waiting down stairs, so lets go down."

**(Emmett's POV)**

Finnally I heard them coming down. But worst of all, Bella had a wierd look on her face, as if she were about to... laugh? Oh no! He didn't.

"So, Emmett. Heard you had to take summer school." Bella said. "I guess after this, Edward and I know who should bake our wedding cake? Isn't that right?"

I shot Edward a very evil look, and faced Bella who was now struggling to not laugh.

"Well Bella, I guess you're right. And I guess my dear brother told you all about it." I replied. "Isn't it time to go Edward?"

"Yes, I guess it is. You _do_ need to be bright eyed for cooking, now don't you?"

I just let a low growl escape, and glowered at my dear brother.

**Well, there it is... chapter 2. Hope you enjoyed it and PLEASE REVIEW! PLEASE! Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoy it!**


	3. First Day

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, which is owned by the amazing Stephanie Meyer, or its characters.**

**First Day**

**(Emmett's POV)**

"Beep, beep, beep!" Yelled my alarm clock. I turned over to face the time. Ughh, 6:30 A.M. You have got to be kidding me. Well, here it was, the first day of summer school. Fun.

Thankfully I'm not able to sleep, because that little thing would have never been able to wake me up. Carlisle had sent me to my room the night before, so I could 'rest up' for today.

I stumbled out of bed, as if I had beed drinking, and went to my closet to pick out an outfit.

_"Stupid Rosalie, and all her stupid clothes." _I thought to myself. The whole closet was full of dresses, pants, shirts, and shoes, shoes, shoes, and more shoes. Me, on the other hand, had about five or six shirts, three pairs of pants, one pair of tennis shoes, and one pair of dress shoes. Rosalie really has to cut back.

I chose a striped blue and white polo, and a pair of jeans. After brushing my hair and teeth very quickly, I ran down the stairs, where everyone was waiting to greet me.

"Well Emmett. You have fun baking cookies you hear?" Jasper stated.

"Yeah Emm. We will be expecting some delactable chocolate chip cookies. To give to Bella that is." Edward said.

"You guys are just _hilarious_." I shot at my two brothers. "Well, I would rather bake cookies than look like you two."

"Oh. Oh my gosh Emmett. You. You just killed me inside." Jasper said, acting as if he were falling to the ground. Just before he fell, he jumped back up and started laughing his butt off.

"You just wait you two. You're time will come. Trust me." I said.

**(Emmett POV: Forks High School)**

This is so wrong. It's the beginning of summer, and here I am. Back at the stupid school, when I'm suppose to be playing with the human.

I hopped out of my car, and walked toward the main building to get my scedule. When I got there, I immediately noticed the new secretary, Darla.

"Umm, yeah. My name is Emmett Cullen, and I need to pick up my scedule."

"Emmett. Emmett. Ah yes, here we are Mr. Cullen. Ok, I just need you to sign here, here, and here."

As I bent down to sign the papers, Darla started saying something, with great realization.

"Ohhh, I know who you are. You are that boy who almost told me off over the phone about the Home Ec. class you had to take."

"Ummm, I think you may be exaggerating. But either way, I'm sorry about that. I was just... you know... upset."

"Oh don't worry 'bout it kid. I just wanted to tell ya that I tried looking for a different class for you to take, but I couldn't find any. Sorry."

"Oh, well, no big deal. It's only three weeks. I'll probably live."

"You are a good kid. Well, have a terrific day!" Darla said merrily.

I walked out of the room muttering to myself.

The first class I had was Trig. Oh great nothing like math in the morning. When I got to the classroom I noticed that there were only about seven kids including me. Worst of all, is that our teacher is the teacher I had for Geometry in my Sophomore year. Man, this day is just getting better and better.

We spent the whole class talking about Sine and Cosine, and other retarded stuff that meant nothing to me. Thankfully the bell rang, just as Mr. Richardson was handing out our homework.

"Alright class," He announced. "All of this is due tomorrow, and expect a quiz."

This caused many moans and groans.

Ok, my next class was... hmm... World History. This class was also almost completely empty.

The whole hour was spent on World War Two, and it's causes. This wasn't as bad as Trig, most of it was pretty interesting. I would have been fully into it, if I didn't have the thought of Home Ec. on my mind. I looked up at the clock and noticed that there was only five minutes left. Hmm, the day is going by pretty fast, which is good. Maybe Home Ec will go by just as fast.

Interupting my thoughts, our teacher, Mr. Munich, handed out sheets of paper with fill in the blank questions. Wonderful, already half of my classes are giving homework. I wonder how much Biology two will have.

Surprisingly not that much. We talked about the function of the human body, and how everything works, and how it works together. Not bad, especially since this is the first class so far that has not given out an assignment. Much to soon, the bell rang just as Mrs. Keely was about to lecture the process of blood flow in the human body.

Oh no. Here it comes. The moment I have been fearing. It's time for... gulp... Home Ec. Someone help me now. Please!

I was pleading in my head all the way to my seat. When I sat down, I looked around the classroom. Everything was silver. The floor, the counter, the appliances, the sink. EVERYTHING! Oh man, these are sure going to be three crappy weeks. REALLY crappy.

"Hello everyone. As some of you may know, I am Mrs. Blake, the Home Ec. instructer. In the three weeks that you are here, I will teach you to bake, the principles of cooking and baking, the reasons for nuitrition, and also how to properly measure and add measurements. And in the end, I can promise you that all of you will have a huge place in your hearts for the joy and love of cooking. Now... any questions?"

"Ummm, yeah. I have one!" I announced.

"Yes? But first, what is your name please?"

"Emmett Cullen. And my question is; what is it like in loony town? I never met anyone who has lived there before,and apparantly you do."

All Mrs. Blake could do was stare at me with a look of shock and horror on her face.

"Emmett Cullen!" She shouted.

"Yep? That is my name." I replied.

"That was absolutely uncalled for, and as punishment, you will be the only one with homework tonight."

Well this sucks. Why can't I ever keep my big mouth shut? Why?

"Tomorrow I expect a two page report on why cooking and baking are important, and a dozen chocolate chip cookies."

"All of that? But... doesn't that seem a bit much?" I questioned.

"For you, no. For others yes. Maybe now you will be more respectfull to me and your peers."

Sheesh, this woman is a nutcase. Man, tonight is gonna be one hell of a night with all of the homework I have.

Thankfully the bell rang, and I was able to go to my house away from all the crazy teachers. But then again, my home is full of crazy relatives. Someone help me now. Please.


	4. Homework!

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, the amazingly amazing Stephanie Meyer does!.**

**Homework**

**(Emmett's POV)**

_"I cannot believe this. I just cannot believe this. Since when is homework passed out in Home Ec. I thought all it was was cooking. This sucks big time! Oh, that teacher will pay. O she will pay." _ I kept muttering these sentances over and over to myself. Tonight I had to bake one dozen chocolate chip cookies, and write an essay! This is summer school for pete's sake. Not to mention the homework in all my other classes.

As I walked into my house, I was immediately bombarded with questions.

"So Emmett?" Edward asked. "How was your cooking class? Did you make me a cake?"

"Shut up Edward. I'm really not in the mood." I replied.

"Awww. What's wong? Was the teacher mean to you? Awww, you poor thing. sniff sniff." Edward asked in a child-like voice.

"Heck yeah she was! I have to bake a dozen cookies, and write an essay on why cooking and baking are important. How am I suppose to know that? I'M A VAMPIRE!" I yelled.

"Well you know that and I know that, but she doesn't, so you better start on that homework." Edward said turning away from me. But before he left, he looked over his shoulder, and said "Just try not to blow up Esme's kitchen? Alright dumb butt?"

"Don't worry. These are gonna be the best cookies ever made by man! It's gonna be like... oh I don't know... like when the cave men discovered fire! YEAH!" Now I was getting all pumped up.

"Yeah, but one thing dummy! Cookies have been disovered a _long_ time ago." Edward replied.

"Fine.. fine bring down my self-esteem. You know, I was happy there. _Real _happy, but you, the big meanie weanie vampire brother, just _had_ to break my spirits. Ok, well if you feel that way, whatever. sniff sniff." I tried my best to act like I was crying when I said this.

As Edward walked up the stairs to his room he said, "Any time dearest brother, any time." I swear, sometimes I just wanna strangle him.

I walked over to the kitchen to find Esme trying out a recipe to make for Bella. That poor poor girl. Esme loves to cook, but frankly... she is... well... terrible.

"Esme?" I ask.

"What is it Emmett? I'm kind of busy."

"I need to make a dozen chocolate chip cookies for Home Ec." As I said this I looked over to Bella who was trying her hardest not to burst out laughing. I shot her a warining look that made her stop, and look like she was staring at a monster or ghost. No pun intended.

"Oh no. Not in my kitchen you're not. No sir." Esme answered sternly.

"Cummon Esme. If I don't do good at this then the teacher is going to punish me even more."

"Why were you punished?"

"Ok, well maybe a let one or two jokes off on her, and she took it the wrong way."

"No duh." Bella said under her breath.

"What was that sweet Bella?" I asked in an evil whisper like tone.

"Oh, nothing Emmett." With that she turned her head the other way. Smart girl.

"Well, I guess so Emmett. But if I see just a smidge of black on my walls... well let's just say, you will be in even bigger crap than last time."

"Alright Esme. I'll be careful."

"Good. Come on Bella. I can make you that dish some other time."

As they walked out, Bella shot me a grateful glance.

Ok, it is now time to start baking. Now where did Esme keep her ingredients. Oh, in the cupboard. All right. Let's get crackin'. At least the directions were simple.

_**Prep:**__ 25 minutes __**Bake:**__ 8 minutes per batch __**Oven:**__ 375 degrees farenheit __**Makes: **__About 60 cookies._

_1/2 cup shortening_

_1/2 cup butter, softened_

_1 cup packed brown sugar_

_1/2 cup granulated sugar_

_1/2 teaspoon baking soda_

_2 eggs_

_1 teaspoon vanilla_

_2 1/2 cups all purpose flour_

_1 12- ounce package(2 cups) semisweet chocolate pieces or miniature candy coated semisweet chocolate pieces._

_1 1/2 cups chopped walnuts, pecans, or hazelnuts (filberts)(optional.)_

Well, may as well put the nuts in. Can't hurt anything.

**(A/N: This is the actual recipe for chocolate chip cookies, in case any of you have a sudden notion to bake along w/ Emmett. HA HA HA I mean, who doesn't love chocolate cookies. Sorry to all those who don't)**

_**1.**__ In a large mixing bowl beat shortening and butter with an electric mixer on medium to high speed for 30 seconds. Add brown sugar, granulated sugar, and baking soda. Beat until mixture is combined, scraping sides of bowl occasionally. Beat in eggs and vanilla until combined . Beat in as much of the flour as you can with the mixer. Stir in any remaining flour. Stir in chocolate pieces and, if desired, nuts._

_**2.**__ Drop dough by rounded teaspoons 2 inches apart onto an ungreased cookie sheet. Bake in a 375 degree oven for 8-10 minutes or until edges are lightly browned. Transfer to a wire rack, and let it cool._

_"Oh man, this is gonna be a piece of cake... or uh... cookie that is" _ I thought to myself as I started to gather ingredients.

I had already set the oven, and had just about all the recipes in the bowl.

"Ok," I thought to myself. "Time to get the dough ready and pop them into the oven."

"BEEP BEEP BEEP!" Sounded the oven timer.

"Woo hoo time to put these babies in. Bye bye my pretties." I muttered to myself.

As I shut the door, I went to the living room to watch T.V along with everyone else.

**(Emmett's POV: A little later)**

_"Hmm, I wonder if those dang cookies are done yet. I still have tons of other homework." _I thought as I got up to check on my creations.

As I opened the oven I could not believe what I saw. No way this could have hapened. No way!

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!" I yell at the top of my lungs

**Sorry if this is a cliffy you guys, but at least I updated sooner than i thought i would right? Well, I stopped there cause i gotta go chow down, cause I cannot eat or drink after midnight since I have to get the widom teeth out. :(**

**And my stomach is killin me from nerves. hahahaha. o well. Well, I'll try to update as soon as I can, but pleeze try to understand if I don't for a while. Thanks for reading, and please review! THANK YOU!!**


	5. note from the author

**Author's Note**

**Hey everyone! Im back and alive! LOL! The whole getting the wisdom teeth out wasnt so bad (Except the IV that put me out kinda hurt, but i was knocked of on lauging gas! WOOO HOOO). Anyways, it will be a few days or so (Probably sooner) before i update. Cuz, I still get headaches off and on, so today I just want to talk w/ my friends, hope u understand. But anyways, thanks for all the reviews, about ten! THATS GREAT!! Well I'll try to update soon, but for now... well... i just need some time to get my chipmunk cheeks to go down. (If any of you have seen Alvin and the chipmunks, my cheeks were bigger than teodores at first, now they are a little smaller. But hey... who doesn't love the big chubby cheeks? Oh, that's right... ME! They are very annoying.hahahaha.) Well, thanks for reading, and for understanding everything! And if any of you have ideas of what I can do while laying down all day, please let me know! Im bored out of my mind. hehehe. o well. Thanks for reading everyone! Peace Love and Chicken grease!!  
**

**(Oh yeah... sorry if i was just saying a bunch of random stuff... its nice to finally get on the computer!)**


	6. Homework disaster

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, or any of it's characters! Yet. **

**Homework disaster**

**(Emmett's POV)**

I cannot believe what I saw. There, in the blown up oven (which Esme will kill me for), was the cookies. Only they were…. Oh I don't know…. _Moving! _I opened the oven to find the chocolate chip cookies moving, with something growing on them. Oh my gosh, how disgusting! I can't kill them, they are too fast. Who can help me, that won't kill me first? Nobody. sigh Well, my only choice is Edward.

"EDWARD! Come here! I need you!" I yelled.

"Sorry Emmett. One I am taken. Two. I am not gay, sorry to disappoint you." He said as he walked in the kitchen.

"Not like that you idiot. Look at the cookies I baked. They are moving." I replied.

"What? Oh I see. You are trying to pull my leg again. Aren't you?"

"No! I swear! Go look in the oven, I need help killing them." I barked.

"Fine, Fine." Edward said as he headed toward the oven. "Crap Emmett! What is this?"

"I don't know what they are. Just kill them." That's when I heard Alice stifle a giggle. "Alice." I said sweetly. "Come here please." That's when I heard her laugh the hardest anyone could ever laugh.

"Oh… My…. Gosh Emmett. I cannot believe this" She said.

"Believe what?" I asked.

"You accidentally…put man-eating… plant seeds… in the batter… instead of chocolate chips!" Alice managed to get out. "They were for some experiment Carlisle wanted to do. That is classic Emmett. Classic."

"You…. you..ugghh." I replied. So, instead of ordinary cookies, I had created a man eating cookie. Man, wont the Home Ec teacher love this. Best of all, I am going to bring them in. Mwahahaha. Now I will be her favorite student. I couldn't help but smile at my two siblings, as I went to start on my essay I still had to write and all that other homework.

**Ok readers, I was nice and decided to write the next chapter. Please forgive me if it is too short. I am very sorry, and I want to thank everyone who wished me luck w/ the wisdom teeth, so THANK YOU!! ****J**** well anyways, please review! They are very appreciated! Peace love and chicken grease!**


	7. Mrs Blake and the Carnivorous Cookies

**Disclaimer: Unfortunately I do not own Twilight or any of the characters. (Dang it.)**

**Mrs. Blake and the Carnivorous Cookies**

**(Emmett's POV)**

Once again, I had to wake (well, not really, since I can't sleep) to the beeping of my alarm clock. Only this time, I was excited to go to school, excited to see Mrs. Blake's expression when she sees my man eating cookies. I hurried, and put on a white T-shirt, with a black leather jacket on top, and pulled on a pair of blue jeans.

"Do you have to leave already Emmett? It's only 6:30, and school doesn't start until eight. Why not relax?" Rosalie asked as she looked up from a People magazine.

"Because I have to be sure my creations are doing alright." I shot back.

"Your crea..." Then she stopped, realizing what I had meant. "Ughh. Fine, but I would think you would want to spend a little time with me. After all, it may be a while if you have so much baking to do in the evenings."

"I'm sorry baby. I'll make it up to you, but for now, I have other things that need attending to." I said as I kissed her on the lips. "But I promise, once all this is over, you and I are going to go down to Seattle or something, and waste the whole day away."

"Fine, but please try not to get into too much trouble."

"Rose, by now you should know that trouble is my middle name."

"Whatever." She replied as she went back to her magazine, which was a signal for me to leave. So I left and shut the door behind me.

"EMMMETT! Get down her NOW!" I heard Jasper and Alice yell.

"What's wrong guys?" I asked.

"One, that is a sexist comment, I happen to be a girl thank you." Alice shot towards me. "And two, your _cookies_ are more carnivorous than we are. One already tried to take Jasper's hand off."

"Well, maybe if you two would leave them alone, they won't try to kill you." I said.

"We were. All we were doing, was getting some breakfast for Bella, because Edward said she looked hungry. So I was going to get her a glass of milk, and Jasper was going to get her a bannana. Then before you knew it, a cookie was trying to knaw through Jasper's finger. My poor baby." Alice cooed the last sentance as she picked Jasper's big sausage finger to kiss it.

"Oh please you two. You guys are almost as bad as Edward and Bella." I said. "Anyways, the linoleum foil was over the plate of cookies. There is no way they were able to chew through all that. So if you two will excuse me, I have to get my beauties to school."

I headed out of the door and towards my jeep. Hmm, should I put the cookies in the front with me, or in the back? The back is probably best, that way _I_ don't get eaten. As I drove to school, I lauged at the thought of me being eaten by a bunch of cookies.

When I got out, I decided to leave my cookies in the jeep with everything locked, that way I can just pick them up before Home Ec. After being sure the cookies were well hidden, I headed to my first hour Trig class. I was very early, only Mr. Richardson was in there, drinking a mug of coffee and reading a Stephen King novel.

I opened the door, which was so loud, that made Mr. Richardson jump so far, that he spilled black coffee everywhere.

"Oh, sorry Mr. Richardson. My bad, maybe you should get a janitor to put some WD40 on the hinges." I said, trying my best to hold back a grin.

"M-maybe you're right Emmett. Wow, that really gave me a jolt." He said lauging nervously, and his black moustache twitching.

"Sooo, is there a quiz today?" I asked.

"Yes Emmett. Don't you remember what I said when I had you for Geometry? That whenever I say there is a chance of a pop quiz, it really means 'study you're butts off, 'cause there is definently going to be a quiz'?"

"Umm, no sir, I really don't remember that. Sorry."

"Ah well. No big deal. But I'm guessing you may want to go over all the sine and cosine stuff. And just for a hint, be sure you know the pythagorean theorem."

"Why? Isn't that Geometry?"

"Yes, it is. But every student in here, I had for Geometry, and I just want to see if anyone remembers what I taught."

"Ok, well I'm going to study. Do you mind if I sit in here?"

"No, go ahead."

I headed over to a desk in the back. Usually I wouldn't study, but Carlisle and Esme said I wouldn't be able to play 'catch the human', or anything else with the human, unless I made all A's and B's. And that was to much for me to bear.

I studied for a half an hour, then everyone started piling in, talking loudly. The class flew by, and the test was a breeze, including all the pythagorean theorem problems.

I picked up my back pack, and slung it over my shoulder, as I headed towards my World History class.

The whole hour, was once again, over World War Two, and all about how it changed the world. Since I lived through it, I pretty much just zoned out, jumping out of my skin once the bell rang. Great, here we go to Biology. Great fun.

Biology really wasn't that bad. All we did was a study guide over the human circulatory system, and diseased that deal with the heart and veins, and arteries. That hour went a little slower than the last, but ended quickly.

I had to go almost vampire speed to run to my jeep, grab the carnivorous cookies, and all the way to the Home Ec room, which was about the farthest building from me. Thankfully I got there on time.

"Alright class, today we are going to start our cooking unit. Today we are going to make a Honey glazed chicken Stir Fry. Know, everyone put your hair up, grab an apron, pair up with someone, and head for the kitcen, and wait for your instructions."

Hmm, maybe she forgot about the cookies. I thought to myself.

"Oh, and afterwards, Emmett will present his cookies if there is time. If not, he will tomorrow. Alright everone, get a piece of paper and pen so you can write down the ingredients, and instructions." Mrs. Blake ordered. "Ok, here it is...

_**Start to Finish: 25 minutesMakes: 4 servings**_

_12 ounces of skinless, boneless chicken breast halves or thighs_

_2 tablespoons of honey_

_2 tablespoons of vinegar_

_2 tablespoons of orange juice_

_4 teaspoons of soy sauce_

_1 1\2 teaspoons of corn starch_

_2 tablespoons cooking oil_

_4 cups of cut-up vegetables, such as broccoli, sweet pepper, onion, and/or mushrooms_

_2 cups of hot cooked rice_

_**1.**__ Cut chicken into bite-size strips; set aside. For sauce, ina small bowl stir together honey, vinegar, orange juice, and cornstarch; set aside._

_**2. **__Pour oil into a wok or large skillet. (If necessary, add more oil during cooking). Heat over medium-high heat. Add vegetables to wok or skillett;cook and stir for 3 to 4 minutes or until vegetables are crisp-tender. Remove vegetables from wok or skillett. Add chicken; cook and stir for 3 to 4 minutes or until chicken is no longer pink. Push chicken from the center of the wok or skillett. Stir sauce; add to center of the wok or skillett. Cook and stir until thickened and bubbly._

_**3.**__ Return cooked vegetables to wok or skillett. Cook and stir about 1 minute more or until heated through. Serve over rice._

**(A/N: This is the recipe to Honey-Glazed chicken. I thought it sounded pretty good.)**

Hmm, this didn't sound too complicated. Maybe my partner, Mike Newton unfortunately, can eat all of this.

"Alright, you go and get the ingredients, and I will get the skillett heated up." I commanded.

"Ok, but just to let you know, I'm allergic to honey." He confessed.

"Really? I'm allergic to... soy sauce. So, I guess none of us can eat this dish? Huh?" I said. I had to have an excuse as to why I couldn't eat the food.

"No, I guess not. Well, let me get the ingredients so we can get done."

When he came back, I immediately started to chop the chicken into small chunks. I would have started a food fight with the chicken, but right now, I think I will be in enough hot water with Mrs. Blake, if not already.

Once the chicken was diced, I started to stir together all the liquids together, except for the soy. Once that was done, Mike put the mixture into the skillett, and it sizzled loudly. All in all, the meal took about 25-35 minutes, and we, unfortunately, had enough time for me to show off my cookies while everyone, except Mike that is, ate.

"Alright everyone," Mrs. Blake announced. "you all did wonderfully with the Honey-glazed chicken stir fry, and it smells wonderful. So, while you eat, Emmett Cullen will present his chocolate chip cookies that he made. Emmett? Will you please come to the front of the class and show us what you created?"

"Yes ma'am. I sure will." I said delightfully as I marched up to the front of the classroom. "Umm, Mrs. Blake? Could you please do the honors of taking the linoleum foil off, I should wash my hands first." I asked as I headed towards the sinks.

"What a very sanitary young man. You know Emmett, I may have been wrong about you. I believe you may become to be a wonderful chef one day." She said with a glimmer in her eye.

Man, good thing I don't have emotions, or else I would have taken the cookies from her and thrown them away. Then my whole plan would have gone down the drain. I guess there are benefits as to being a vampire. Or a 'stupid unreliable vampire' as Bella puts it.

As I turned on the faucet, that's when I heard Mrs. Blake's high pitched screech.

"EMMETT!" She yelled. "What are these things?"

"Uh, chocolate chip cookies of course."

"Wh-why are they moving?"

"Oh. I must have accidently put man eating plant seeds in the batter instead of the chocolate chips. See, my father is doing a study with them."

"You're father is a doctor. Why in the world would he have these kinds of seeds laying around. And for what kind of expirament?"

"Well I sure am not the doctor, so I couldn't tell you." As I said that, right then one of the cookies somehow lept into the air, and bit onto Mrs. Blake's right index finger, and bit hard."

"Oww!" She cried out. "Emmett, get rid of these monster cookies! NOW!"

"Yes Ma'am." I said with my head down, trying not to laugh my butt off at the sight of her face, which was redder than a tomato, and her ears literally had smoke coming out of them."

"And you will make another batch, only no 'accidents' and you will write another essay on why carnivorous cookies are dangerous."

"Umm, isn't that a little obvious, about why they are dangerous?" I asked.

"Apparantly not to you. Class you are dismissed, and Emmett... I will see you in detention."

"Wonderful" I muttered quietly to myself. "More homework and now detention."

I was bummed out, but the expression on Mrs. Blake's face was priceless. I laughed hard all the way to my jeep, and kept on lauging as I drove home.


	8. Bella and Emmett play Truth or Dare

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, but I do own this Fanfic.**

**Bella and Emmett play Truth or Dare**

**(Emmett's POV)**

Great more cookie baking, just what I need. I couldn't help but mope all the way home. Knowing that I have to bake the cookies over again, just bummed me out big time. Hmmm, maybe if Edward sees me all upset, maybe he will let me play with the human, or maybe even feed it a cookie!

"YAY!" I shouted at the top of my lungs, as I drove along the highway. "Im gonna feed the human a cooookie. Im gonna feed the human a coookie." All the way home, I yelled this in a sing song voice.

"I'M HOOOOME!" I sang as I entered the door. "Anyone here?"

"Hey Emmett!" Bella said, as she came out of the kitchen.

"Hey Bella, where is everyone?"

"Oh, Edward and Jasper took a ride in Edward's Volvo. I think they had to run to the gas station, or something like that. Rosalie and Alice are on a shopping trip, and Carlisle and Esme are... well... I'm really not too sure. Not here though."

Man, this is absolutely perfect for my, play and feed the human, plan.

"Hey uhh, Bella?" I asked in a depressed voice.

"What is it Emmet? Are you alright." Bella asked. Silly Bella. Always worried about everyone, and never herself.

"Well Bella... the thing is..."

"What Emmett?"

"Well, none of the other boys at school will play with me... so I was wondering.."

"Emmett, the only reason none of the boys play with you, is because you are the only gay one." Bella said with a snicker.

"Oh shut up Bella. I just wanted to know if you and I could hang out?"

"Ohhhh, well why didn't you say so?"

"Can we?" I asked in an eager voice.

"Ummm, no."

"Cummon Bells. Today was a really bad day for me. Please please PLEASE entertain me."

"Well... as long as it doesn't involve me getting hurt or playing catch the human. Okay?"

"Okay. So, what should we do? Hmmm... OH I KNOW! I KNOW!!"

"What Emmett? What?" Bella asked in an annoyed voice.

"WE CAN PLAY TRUTH OR DARE!!"

"No Emmett. No. We played that once already. Remember?"

I did remember. I dared Bella to go up and kiss Mike Newton. Ha ha ha. That was classic. Especially when Edward found out.

"Please Bella?"

"Uughhh. _Fine_."

"HOORAY! Ok. Truth or Dare Bella? Ok Dare."

"Wait, I didn't say dare."

"Fine, truth or dare?"

**(Bella's POV)**

Omigosh. I cannot believe I agreed to play Truth or Dare with Emmett Cullen. That is like... oh I don't know...SUICIDE! He is crazy with the dares. But if I do truth, he will ask something personal. There was only one thing to do.

"Ok Emmett. I choose... dare." I replied.

"YES! Oh man are you going to be sorry. Bella Swan. I dare _you_ to tell Charlie that you are pregnant, and that you plan to run away with Edward and the baby."

Omigosh. What did I do. I cannot do this, Charlie will have a field day.

"You have got to be kidding me Emmett? Tell Charlie that. Well... that's insane. Phsychotic."

"Are you chicken?"

"No."

"Then you will do the dare."

"Fine, but you will be sorry Emmett Cullen. Very very sorry."

It took about 10 or so minutes to get to my house from the Cullen's. And in that short amount of time, my hands were already making a pool of sweat in my hands. Why oh why did I have to do this. Anythng but this.

"Alright Bella dearest. Here we are."

"I got out of the car and headed up the front steps. Of course Charlie had to stay home from his fishing trip today, naturally."

"Bells? Is that you?" Charlie asked from the living room.

"It's me dad. Can you come into the kitchen, I have something important to tell you." As I heard him shuffle out of his recliner, I looked out the window to see Emmett's face pressed against the window. Oh man, is he dead.

"What is it Bella?"

"Well dad. It's kind of... serious."

"Ok, well tell me."

"Promise you won't be mad?"

"Depends what it is. Now tell me."

"Well dad. Im... Im... Im pregnant, and I'm running away with Edward and the baby."

Unbelievably, he didn't yell. He just kind of stared at me with rage in his eyes.

"PREGNANT?! RUNNING AWAY?!" He shouted.

"Yeah. I know you are disappointed in me but..." I began.

"Dissapointed? You think Im disappointed. I'm not disappointed, Im enraged at you. You, pregnant?" With that, he just dropped to the floor. Omigosh, he fainted. I turned around to see Emmett lauging his head off.

"Dad? Dad? Wake up. Are you ok?"

"Hmm? Bella? That you?"

"Yeah, are you alright."

"NO!" He shouted. "How can I be ok when my daughter is telling me she is pregnant and running away?"

"What are you talking about dad? You must have been dreaming."

"What? No, I was certain that you said you were... maybe not. It was all a dream?"

"Yeah, I just came over too... get a...jacket. It is a little chilly outside."

Whew, good thing he fainted. There would have been no other way to get out of that one.

"Oh ok sweetie. I... I think Im going to lay down. I feel a little dizzy."

"Ok, I'll be home tonight. Love you."

"Love you too Bells."

I hurried and grabbed my jacket and ran to meet Emmett at the jeep.

"Hahaha. I can't believe that you went through with that. Good thing he fainted."

"Yeah good thing. Oh, and uhhhh... Emmett?"

"Yeeeeeees?"

"Truth or Dare?"


	9. Emmett's Dare

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of it's characters**

**Emmett's Dare**

**(Emmett's POV)**

_**"**__Oh man, Bella is going to get me back sooo good. Ahhh! What have I done? Ok, if I choose Truth, I have to tell Bella something unbelievably embarassing. If I choose Dare, Bella will make me do something embarassing. Hmmm, well, Bella isn't exactly great with making up dares.Hmm" _I thought to myself

"Ok Bells. I choose... DARE!! WOOO HOOO!" I yell.

"Oooohhh Emmett! You are going to wish you were never born. Oh man Oh man. Ok Emmett. Your dare is to paint Jasper and Edward's car pink, and write gay and proud on it. Then, you have to paint Alice's car a dark color and write 'I get my clothes as hand me downs, and from discount stores. With Rose's car, you have to paint it a dark color as well, and write... umm... Oh I KNOW! You, Emmett Cullen, has to write 'Ask me where to get great plastic surgery from' on Rose's BMW!"

"NO WAY BELLA! There is no way on Earth that I am going to write that on Rosalie's car NO WAY! Besides, I have to bake another batch of cookies, only without the man eating plant seeds in them."

"You can, just after your dare. Or else, I will tell everyone how you are a little sissy boy and can't manage a single little dare."

"You wouldn't."

"I would."

"Fine, have it your way. But if I get in trouble, Im saying it was a dare."

"Whatever."

I cannot believe this was the dare Bella had in mind. Holy crud, Im in deep trouble. Well, may as well get it over with it.

I went outside and painted the boy's car pink and wrote Gay and Proud on it, and then did the girls' cars.

"Happy Bella?" I asked.

"Very. And coincidently, Edward and everyone else are on their home right now."

"How do you know that?"

"Ohh, I just started to miss Edward terribly, so I thought that I would give him a ring."

"BELLAAAAAA! Why did you do that.Now I'll be tortured and killed even sooner. I have to hide. But where?" I frantically tried to find somewhere to hide, when all of a sudden I heard...

"EMMETT CULLENN!! GET YOUR BUTT OUT HERE NOW!" Yelled several voices.

"Oh crap. Thanks a lot Bella. Thanks a lot." I muttered as I headed out towards the driveway.

"H-h-hey guys! What's kickin' " I asked.

"My foot, up your butt. What is this?" Rosalie asked in a furious voice.

"I swear Emmett, you are the stupidest, idiotic person I have ever known." Jasper replied.

"Yeah Emm..." Alice started.

"WAIT GUYS!" I shouted over the comotion. "It was a DARE! A dare I tell you a dare!"

"A dare? Yeah right Emmett!" Edward argued. "Who would have been stupid enough to dare you to do this?"

"Our little human."

"Bella? No way. Bella would never do anything like this. And even if she did, I would forgive her. But not you, because you could have very well have said no, but instead you say yes."

"But... but..."

"SHUT UP EMMETT!" Rosalie yelled. "You are lucky that I don't file for divorce!"

"Rose, Im sorry. Listen I'll make it up to you. You and I will ride in my jeep and take a romantic ride. Okay? Does that sound good?"

"No Emmett that does not sou..." She started to say, with a smile growing on her lips. "Actually Emmett, that sounds nice. But can we take Charlie's jeep? I love riding in it. The motor has a soft soothing sound that I love."

"Sure Rose.. no problem, lets go." I said as I took her by the hand. As we passed Edward, I could have sworn that he said 'Great idea Rose.' at vampire speed. Probably just a coincidence. I hope.

**Ok guys, sorry it took so long to update. Pleeeease forgive me!! :). And I didn't mean to offend anyone with the gay and proud thing, and if I did please PM me and let me know. PLEASE REVIEW! Reviews seem to make me write faster (hint hint) LOL. Peace love and chicken grease**


	10. The Plan

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters.**

**The plan**

**(Edward's POV)**

_"Stupid Emmett. Stupid stupid stupid. How could he have done this to me. And to say Bella dared him! Well, maybe I can believe that, but he was stupid to go along with it." _I kept mumbling to myself, and thinking about ways to kill Emmett after _the plan._ Yes, we do have a plan. Thankfully Rose was kind enough to go on a ride with Emmett so we could get him back.

"Why is this paint not coming off?" Alice whined.

"It's ok Alice, it will. Just give it some umph." I told her.

As we were washing the paint off, here comes Mike Newton down the road.

"Hey Edward!" He yelled out of his cars window. "I didn't know that you were, well... you know."

"Shut up mike. It isn't true, it was one of Emmett's dumb pranks again."

"Ohhh Ok, suuuuree. HAHAHA!" He laughed as he sped down the road. "See ya at school!"

Oooh Emmett is going to pay dearly.

"Emmett?" Jasper asked.

"Yeah Jasp?"

"What was that look Rose gave you before she left with Emmett for?"

"Oh, she just thought of an ingenius way to pay Emmett back for what he did."

"Ooooh, tell us Eddie! Tell us." Alice begged.

"I will. As long as you never ever call me Eddie again." I said through clenched teeth.

"Ok, Rose wants us to do something terrible to Emmett's precious jeep. You know Eye for an eye?"

"OH MY GOSH THAT IS PERFECT!" Alice squealed, half yelled. "We can paint it pink and... and... write Spice Girl Fanatic on it!"

"No no no. It has to be something better. Here is what we will do. We are going to ruin it, not destroy it. That would be too harsh. We will scratch it up, and _then_ paint it pink and write 'I'm a barbie girl' all over it. Alice, we will need tons of glitter. And I mean tons."

"Gotcha brother dearest." She replied, while doing a salute.

"Jasper, we will need something sharp to make the scratches nice and big, and I will go get the paint. Everyone meet here in about 25 minutes. Ready, set, go!"

Once everyone left, I made my way for the hardware store.

When I got there, I found that there were more shades of pink than I thought there were. Pink, salmon, strawberry, neon pink, blah, blah, blah. Then I saw it. It was a hot pink, but it was brighter than a regular hot pink. I quickly picked it up, paid at the cash register, and ran at vampire speed back to Jasper and Alice.

"Ok, does everyone have everything?" I asked.

"Yep. I found plenty of glitter in my sewing box kit."

"And Carlisle had tons of tools. I decided on a screw driver, a saw, and a hammer."

"Perfect. Now it's time to get to work."

**(Emmett's POV)**

"Gee Rose. You are sure being nice to me after all that I had done."

"Oh Emmett. I was furious, but when you said Bella dared you, well... I don't know, I guess I just love you too much."

"Awwwww. Do you want a big Emmett hug?"

"NO!! Stay away!" Rosalie screamed as she held her arms off as to ward me off.

"Fine, but I thought you said that this was gonna be romantic."

"Well, the moon isn't up yet now is it?"

"No. Well, where do you want to go?"

"Just a drive. The house is so boring these days."

"Yeah." Was all I could think of to say, until I had a question. "Is everyone else mad?"

"Of course they are. All of them want to kill you right now. That is why we left."

"Ohhh I see. Hey, I have an idea. How about we go see a movie?"

"Ugh, ok Emmett. Whatever you want."

"YAY! WE'RE GONNA SEE A MOOVIE, WE'RE GONNA SEE A MOOVIE!" I shouted.

"Okay, okay Emmett, enough."

"We're gonna see a moovie, we're gonna see a movie." I whispered, but Rose still heard me.

"Emmett." She said in a warning voice.

"Okay. Ill stop"

**(Rosalie's POV)**

_"How much longer must I put up with this. I hate going to movies with Emmett, they are always dumb action movies, or movies with the Spice Girls in it. Isn't Edward done with the jeep yet? He said he would call when he was done, and it has been an hour. Pretty bad when a vampire takes this long to do something. YEAH THAT'S RIGHT EDDIE, I SAID IT!" _ I yelled in my head, hoping Edward was paying attention.

"What movie do you want to see Emmett?" I asked in my sweetest voice.

"I don't know, but let's go inside."

"Okay, tell me when you have bought the tickets."

It took approximately ten minutes for my idiotic husband to decide. And worst of all, the theater was completely full, and the person two chairs away from me kept burping loudly. Eeew, I hate the movies. Once the movie started, I was disappointed to see that the movie was an action, naturally. I started to get into it. When all of a sudden, it came on. Yes, the Spice Girls. Emmett, of course, noticed and got up on his chair singing and belly dancing.

_"Slam it to the left._

_If you're having a good time_

_Shake it to the right_

_If you know that you feel fine_

_Chicas to the front_

_Uh uh go round_

_Slam it to the left_

_If you're having a good time_

_Shake it to the right_

_If you know that you feel fine_

_Chicas to the front_

_Hi Ci Ya Hold tight!"_

Thankfully for me, a security guard came in and escorted Emmett out of the building, for 'disturbance of the peace.'

About a minute later, I left to meet up with him at my BMW.

"Sorry about that Emmett. Anything else you want to do?" I asked, trying my hardest to keep my cool. But before he could answer, my cell rang.

"About time." I muttered under my breath.

"Hello?" I ask.

"Bring him home Rose. Bring him home."

"Okay, I'll be there in about 2 minutes. Bye."

"Emmett? We need to go home now ok? Bella reminded me that you still have to make cookies, and I'm getting pretty tired."

"sigh Ok Rose. And Im sorry about what I did in the movies."

"Oh its ok. I know you were just having fun. Now lets go." I ordered.

**(Emmett's POV)**

The ride home was very quiet. Was Rose mad at me? Does she still love me? Ughh I just need to chill out. Thankfully the ride was about over, and our mansion came into view.

When we pulled up, I realized something was wrong, terribly wrong. There was some kind of... umm... stiffness, and quietness in the air.

I walked around to the backyard to see if everything there was alright.

That's when I saw it. This cannot be happening to me.

"NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" I yelled at the top of my lungs.

**(Edward's POV)**

I was sitting on the couch in the living room with Jasper, Alice and Bella. We were in the middle of a board game, when we heard a loud, well, VERY loud yell.

I turned to Alice, Jasper and Bella and asked, "Do you think he found it?"

**Ok guys! There is the next chapter! I hope you enjoyed it! PLEASE REVIEW! I beg of you. Reviews make me happy, and when Im happy, I get great ideas for chapters! HAHAHA! Well, thanks for reading, and tell me what u think! Peace love and chicken grease.**


	11. Emmett's Pink Jeep

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, or its characters.**

**Emmett's Pink Jeep**

**(Emmett's POV)**

_"No no no no no! How could they do this to me! My beautiful, manly jeep! I-its pink! Why pink? AHHHHHH! And worst of all, I'm a barbie girl is written on it! NOOOOO!! I AM NOT A BARBIE GIRL! I'm a spice girl, and they know it! Darn them all!" _I thought quietly to myself.

"What is this you guys? MY JEEP!? Why my jeep?" I asked the group in a pleading voice.

"Well, this is what you did to our cars, and you wrote worse on our cars." Rosalie replied.

"I thought you forgave me Rose? What about our wedding vows, you know, 'for better and for worse.'? What about all that?"

"Lighten up Emmett."

"No, I really don't want to talk to anyone right now. So if you guys will leave, I'd appreciate it."

"Oh, Emmett, come on. Rose can fix those scratches up in a jiffy, and we can repaint it. Ok?" Alice asked. "And besides, I saw your jeep being pimped anyways."

"I liked my jeep the way it was."

"Ok then, I promise we will repaint it ok?"

"One more thing. I get to play with the human."

"NO NO NO AND NO!" Edward stated. "You are not going to play with the human, but I will allow you to feed her."

"Can I feed her one of the cookies Im going to make?" I asked excitedly.

"As long as it has regular chocolate chips in them instead of man eating plant seeds, then yes."

"YIPPEEE!! IM GONNA FEED THE HUUMAN! IM GONNA FEED THE HUUUUMAN!" I yelled in a sing song kind of voice. "I think Im going to go and cook now. Can you guys fix the jeep before tomorrow?"

"Umm, FYI Emmett. We're vampires. It's called vampire speed, we can get it done in about ten minutes."

"Ok, well see ya! I've got some cooking I have to do."

Once I got into the kitchen, I immediately got to work. It wasn't too hard, since I had the recipe memorized, and the vampire speed helped as well. Oh man, I really hope these make Mrs. Blake happy, or else I'll get detention for the rest of summer school, and into the next school year.

"BELLA!" I called once the cookies were about done.

"Yeah Emmett?" She asked, with Pride and Prejudice in her hands.

"First, haven't you read that book millions of times?"

"Yeah, but I like this book. You should give it a try."

"Yeah, sure, Ok. Whenever I'm in an old folks home. OH WAIT! I'm never gonna be in an old folks home. Hmm, well sorry. Guess I'm out of luck."

Bella just glared at me, followed by a long eye roll.

"What did you need Emmett?" She asked with an annoyed tone.

"Will you PLEEEEEEEASE eat one of my 'super duper Emmett style chocolate chip cookies'? PLEEEASE?"

"I don't know. You didn't put anything dangerous in it did you?"

"Nope, just chocolate chips, flour, sugar, eggs, baking soda. You know, everything that goes into a cookie."

"Ok, I'll give it a try." She said as she reached down to pick up a chocolaty cookie.

I watched her as she took a bite. Once she chewed it, she smiled and closed her eyes as the cookie went down her throat.

"What's wrong Bella? Eeeew! Did you just let gas out?" I asked while holding my nose. "Is that why you are smiling?"

"Eeew Emmett! Gross. No, the cookie is just that good. They remind me of my grans cookies. They bring back good memories from when I was little and would help her in the kitchen."

"Oh I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you sad Bella." I said as I gave her one of my big Emmett bear hugs.

"No, I'm not sad at all. Just happy. These are amazing Emmett, I'm sure Mrs. Blake will be pleased."

"Yeah, I hope so. Well, I'm going to go and see if all the pink paint is off. Talk to you later Bells."

With that I went out to the back, and there stood my jeep. Only it was still pink!

"You guys! I thought you said that you would get the paint off?"

"We tried really we did Emmett. But I forgot that the paint doesn't wash off, and it looks even worse if you paint over it. I'm really sorry." Edward said in an apologetic voice.

"S-s-so I have to drive _that_ to school?" I asked as I leaned my head in the direction of the jeep.

"Umm, I guess so Emmett. We are really sorry." Alice answered.

After Alice's comment, there was a low murmur of apologies. Then Rose came up to me, and gave me a passionate kiss.

"Emmett, I'm really really sorry. I should never have done this to you. Please forgive me?" She whispered in my ear.

"Uuugh. It's ok Rose. I know I have done worse than this to you, and you always forgive me. I love you."

"Oooh, I love you too Emmett!" She cooed as she gave me another kiss.

"Uggh. Can you two get a room? _PLEASE?_" Jasper asked in an exaggerated sigh.

I took Rose by the hand, and gave her one more kiss, just to pee jasper off. Hahaha. Well, tomorrow is another day. I just can't _wait_ to see what's in store for me. NOT!

**Okay dokay people. I hope you all liked it. Please Review! I'll try to update tomorrow, but Im having a friend come over, so it may be Saturday when I update! Peace love and chicken grease. (Oh yeah, Sorry if this wasn't a great chapter, but they will get better, I PROMISE) Also, go to my profile, because I am going to have a poll up! SO VOTE! :)**


	12. Dumb Author's note

**Hey Everyone! First I wanna say thanks to all the reviews I have been getting, so THANKS! And I also wanted you all to know that I finally have the poll up, so go vote for what you would like me to write about next. Eventually I may write all of the poll options, but for now, vote on what you think I should write next! THANK YOU EVERYONE! :)**


	13. Food Fight!

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, or its characters.**

**Food Fight!**

**(Emmett's POV)**

It was the next day, and I was still sore about my jeep. I will be the lauging stock of the entire school. And Newton. Oh man, Newton will see it, and I will never live it down. HEEEEEELP!

"Good morning Emmett." Rose whispered in my ear.

"Stop Rose!" I giggle. "That tickles."

"Ok. You may want to get a move on it. You are going to be late!"

I looked up at the clock and it read 8:00 A.M.

"Oh crap. I have to run! Bye Rose."

"Bye." She replied as she gave me a quick kiss on the lips. "Don't forget about the cookies."

"Right. Bye."

I hurried down the stairs, grabbed the plate of chocolate chip cookies, and my car keys, and headed out the door.

Today was a beautiful day, not a cloud in the sky. It would be perfect if it weren't for my pink jeep. Well, I guess it could have been worse. I got into my jeep, and turned on the radio, thinking music would help. It didn't. Edward and Jasper must have rigged the radio to only play 'Barbie girl' on every station. How they did it, is a mystery to me.

"CRAAAAAAAAAAP!" I yell at the top of my lungs as I start the engine. I didn't have time to go and grab a few cd's, since it was already 8:15. Today was going to be a _wonderful_ day. NOT!

I pull into the school parking lot, to find Mike Newton and Jessica holding hands while walking to the main office.

"Hey Cullen!" Mike shouted towards me. "I love the jeep! It's really... umm... pimped." With that he let off a nasaly snort, followed by a loud laugh that sounded like a crow cawing.

"Shut up mike! I'd rather have this jeep, than to have to look like you!"

"Oooh, I'm soo hurt. I think I'll need phsycological counseling." He said in a sarcastic tone of voice.

This made me want to have a little bit of fun with Mike. I drove up quietly behind them, and at the last minute, drove through a huge puddle of water, spraying Mike and Jessica.

"Cullen, you freak!!" Jessica yelled, drenched with water.

"You will pay Emmett, trust me." Mike threatened.

"Yeah, whatever." I said, and sped away.

The day was going by pretty fast. I had no homework so far, and it wasn't raining. It was perfect, until it was time to go to Home Ec. Which, I so unfortunately, had with Mike Newton.

"Good afternoon class." Mrs. Blake announced. "Today, we will be making spagetti with meat sauce. I also expect good behavior, and no goofing off." She glared at me with evil eyes as she said this. "But first, one of our students had homework the other night. Emmett, would you please bring up your homework assignment. And remember, if there is anything besides the called ingrediants, you will fail this class. Understood?"

"Yes ma'am, and here you go." I replied as gentlemanly as I could.

"Mmm, yummm, mmmm." Mrs. Blake did the same thing as Bella did. She closed her eyes as she chewed. What is it with humans? Its like they actually _enjoy _these things.

"Oh Emmett." Mrs. Blake whispered. "These are marvalous, simply marvalous! I have never had anything quite like it. Now you see, if you really put your mind to something, you can achieve it. All you have to do is become a little more mature. Now... Everyone to the kitchen, and get started. I set the indgrediants on each table, one for each group."

_" Simply marvalous, simply marvalous." _I mocked in my head. _"Hmmph, she apparantly doesn't know me very well. I am mature, I just like having fun. Stupid old home ec. teacher. Doesn't know how to have fun. Hmm, pity. Maybe... maybe I should show her how to have fun. And I know the perfect way."_

I headed for the kitchen and started gathering the supplies my group would need for the pasta. Unfortunately Mike was in my group, and he made me, the vampire, do EVERYTHING. Stupid human.

As we were mixing the hamburger into the spagetti sauce, a brilliant idea dawned on me. I knew exactly how to get Newton back, and show the teacher how to have fun.

I was just about to stick my hand in, when all of a sudden, a calmness came over me, and I immediately forgave Mike. This made me decide not to start the food fight. Stupid Jasper, and his stupid power.

As I was thinking mean thoughts about Jasper, I saw a quick motion out of the corner of my eye, and WHAP! I huge fistfull of spagetti sauce hit me on the side of my face. Mike. Then, before I could do to him what he had done to me, some other kid yelled... "FOOD FIGHT!!"

And then it started. There was spagetti, sauce, meat, cheese, and many other ingrediants flying around the kitchen. I was able to smack Mike's face with a little bit of each. Wow this is fun, a lot of fun. I should play this with Bella some time.

"WHAT IS GOING ON HERE!" Yelled a voice. It was Mrs. Blake, along with Mr. Richardson, our principle. "I'm gone for one second, and there is already a mess! Who started this?!"

I pointed towards Mike, who pointed towards me.

"Both of you, come with me." Mr. Richardson stated in a deep and terrifying voice.

"But I didn't do it Mr. Richardson!" I pleaded. If I got in trouble one more time, Esme wouldn't let me play with the human anymore.

"I don't care! BOTH OF YOU FOLLOW!" He bellowed in a booming voice.

Mike and I silently walked out the door and down the halls, behind Mr. Richardson.

When we got in his office, he motioned us each to sit in a chair.

"Now, what is this all about?" Mr. Richardson questioned.

"Well, you see sir.." I started. " It all happened when I was stirring the meat sauce for the spagetti. That's when all of a sudden, I saw a quick motion out of the corner of my eye, and BAM! Spaggetti sauce was covering me."

"How do I know that you are not lying?"

"I swear! No crossed fingers either!" I pleaded.

"Is there anyone who can back you up?"

"Uhh, _yeah._ Kinda like the entire _class._"

"What do you have to say Mr. Newton? Is this true." Mr. Richardson asked.

"No! It's not. Ask anyone, and they should tell you it wasn't me."

"Well, I can see that the only resolution is to ask the rest of the students." Replied Mr. Richardson.

So with that, we headed back down the hall, back to the Home Ec. classroom.

"Everyone, come sit at your tables." Mr. Richardson ordered. "We have a dilemma. Mr. Cullen here says that Mr. Newton started the food fight, while Mr. Newton blames Mr. Cullen. Does anyone know for certain who started this. If you say Mr. Newton did, raise your hand."

About half the class raised their hands, and the other half blamed me.

"Well, since it is 50/50, both of you will have to serve one days worth of detention, tomorrow after school. Now, all of you are dismissed for the day." Mr. Richardson announced as he turned his back to us. "And I expect to see you two tomorrow after school. Don't think I will forget, because I won't. I have the memory of an elephant."

That was true, nobody, not even _me_ could get away with anything with Mr. Richardson.

Well, this sucked. And I mean REALLY sucked. I got in trouble for something I didn't even do. Hmmph. Boy is Esme gonna be mad. Which means... n-no more play time with the human. AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!

**Well, first I wanna say THANK YOU! To anyone who reviewed for the last chapter, they mean a lot! Also If any of you have any ideas, or something you want to see in this story, LET ME KNOW!! Just PM me, and I can almost guarantee, that if you have a good idea, it will be put in this story. And if you do give me ideas, and if I use them, I WILL mention your name at the beginning, and let everyone know it was your idea! So please review, and also PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE Pm me with your ideas! Thanks everyone!! Peace love and chicken grease!**


	14. Kitchen BlowUp!

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or its characters. Yet. Muahahaha. LOL**

**Just to let everyone know, this idea came from EdwardXD, So thanks to you for the great idea! Peace and Love!**

**Kitchen Blow Up!!**

**(Emmett's POV)**

_"Stupid principle. I didn't do anything. He even called Esme! How could he?! That stupid buttface. People say he is a great asset for our school. I say they are off by two letters. My jokes crack me up. But now Esme has forbidden me to go anywhere near the human. IM GONNA DIE!! SAVE ME NOOOOOOOOOWW!"_

I was thinking all this to myself while Esme was giving me a lecture on 'why cooking is a valuable skill'. Of course Esme would agree with the teacher and principle. What I also don't understand, is why Esme still loves to cook this much. HELLOOOOO WE ARE VAMPIRES! Uuuggh. This is gonna be one long ride home.

"Another reason that you should love cooking, is because it is a well respected buisness. You could even own your own restraunt if you wanted too!" Esme pointed out

"Esme, I have no desire to work in the culinary arts field. I wanna work in the 'play with the human' arts field." I complained.

"You should have thought of that when you decided to start that food fight."

"I DIDN'T! Mike Newton did! I swear."

"Don't use that tone of voice with me mister." Esme said in her, 'I'm your mother and you know it' kind of voice.

"Hmmph." Was all I could manage. Thankfully we are vampires, and we can reach our house in like, 2 minutes. I would have died if I had to talk to Esme any longer.

Of course though, when we entered through the door, Alice was lauging her butt off, and Edward was smiling mischeviously.

"Hello dear brother. Alice told me that she saw Esme telling you that you couldn't play with my darling Bella."

"Yeah, and what if she did."

"Well that means, that I have something less to worry about."

"What if I decide to go against Esme's rules?"

"I can read you mind."

"What if I block my thoughts?"

"Alice can tell the future."

Stupid vampire siblings, with their stupid vampire ablilities.

"Fine Eddie, but when summer school ends, which is in about half a week, I WILL give Bella the biggest Emmett bear hug she has ever had. MUAHAHAHAHAAAAA!"

With that I left my stupid brother and Alice to go to my room.

Thankfully Rose was there and I could talk to her. She loves me.

"Hey Rose!" I said as I picked her up, and sat her in my lap. "How was your day?"

"Pretty good. Just fiddling around the house. You?"

"A total nightmare."

"Awww, what happened?"

"Mike started a food fight, and I got blamed for it. And now I can't go anywhere near the human."

"Im sorry Emm. But at least you and I can still be together."

"Yeah, that is good."

With that Rose started to kiss me pationately. Hmm. maybe today won't be all that bad.

_"My gosh, she is a good kisser. She has never kissed like this before. Aww, she is trying to make me feel better."_

With that I kissed her passionately back, and she wound her fingers through my hair. Unfortunately it ended there, when a certain brother of mine came barging in.

"OH MY GOSH! Umm... I... uhh...didn't mean to disturb your... uh...thing." Edward stammered.

"Its called knocking you moron." I spat.

"I...I did. I guess you two...umm...didn't hear me."

"Just get out you idiot."

"Ok, just..uhh...carry on. I guess." Edward replied.

I started to get up when Rose pulled me back down.

"Just because he left doesn't mean you have to." Rose said giving me a mischevious grin, and started kissing me and everything else, all over again.

**(About 1/2 an hour later Emmett's POV)**

Ok, now I need to get crakin on my homework. Biology was just about the circulatory system. Nothing too hard, I finished that in a jiffy. The rest was pretty easy too, and once I was finished, I went to join my sibs on the couch to watch Hell's Kitchen. **(A/N- Had to put hells kitchen on, LOVE THAT SHOW! :D)**

It was, of course, another cooking show. Lucky me.

Only, about halfway into the show, I was so into it, it scared me. That Gordon Ramsey is a flipping genius. Hmm, if cooking can be that fun, maybe..just maybe..I will give home ec. a try.

The next day came pretty fast. I was ready by 6:30 and out the door by 7:30. I had to talk to Mrs. Blake.

I walked into the classroom to find her typing away at her computer. She was wearing a hideous granny dress, which had flowers all over it **(A/N: The website the dress is on, can be found in my profile, at the bottom of the page.)**

"Ahemm." I coughed.

"HOLY BEJEEBIES!!" Mrs. Blake called out in surprise. "Emmett what do you want?"

"I wanted to stop by and say I'm sorry for the other day. I swear I didn't do it, but if it makes you feel better, I will apologize."

"Oh that's alright Emmett. I remember my first cooking class. I hated it more than you do. I actually threw cookie dough at my instructer. Hahaha. Good times."

"I also wanted to tell you, that I think I will give cooking a chance. Although I may not be good at it."

"Emmett, nobody is good at cooking on their first try. You just have to practice. And I'm happy that you are giving cooking a chance. But for now, you may want to head to your first hour, school is going to start in about ten minutes."

I headed out of the door thinking about what Mrs. Blake had said.

Pretty soon, I realized that I had been daydreaming throughout all of my classes, and I found myself in home ec.

"Alright everyone! Today, we are going to bake cookies, and I expect proper behavior from all of you this time."

I thought she was staring at me, but when I looked up at her, she was glaring at Mike. She believed what I had said.

"Ok, we don't have a minute to lose. Everyone in their kitchen, and start NOW!!"

I went to gather the supplies, while everyone in my group prepared everything. Ok, all I had to do, was to think like Gordon Ramsey. Hmm. what would he say to me right now, if he were here. Oh I know. He would say 'Hurry up you stupid pig! You haven't got all day!'

I went back to the station and started putting the called ingredients into a bowl, and mixed everything together. It didn't take too long until we had to put the cookies in the oven.

While we were baking, my group and I washed the dishes, played hang man, and a game of M.A.S.H.

"Hmm... I wonder why the cookies are.." I started to say. But I was interupted by a lout BANG! Which made everyone shout out in surprise, and made Mrs. Blake fall over backwards.

When I looked up, the whole kitchen was covered in black. Even a glaring Mrs. Blake.

"EMMETT! What did you do?!" She hissed.

"I-I don't know ma'am. We were waiting for the cookies to finish, and then this happened."

"Did you set. The. Timer?" She asked through clenced teeth.

Uh-oh...the timer.

"Oh. Mrs. Blake...Im uh...so sorry. I really did forget to set the timer."

"Just get out Emmett."

"But Mrs. Blake..."

"GET OUT! That goes for everyone else in Emmetts group. Just. Go. Home."

I felt terrible, but I had to leave. Once Class was over though, I went back.

"Umm, Mrs. Blake.." I said.

"What do you want Emmett? What?"

"I just wanted to say I'm sorry, and it was an honest mistake. I also wanted to come back and help you clean this up."

"You want to help fix the kitchen back up?"

"Yeah, Im very very sorry."

"Ok Emmett, but if you do anything stupid one more time, you are kicked out of my class. Understood."

"Yes ma'am."

"Good. Now you can start sweeping over there." She pointed towards the blackest part of the kitchen.

As I was sweeping, I couldn't help but wonder what was in store for tomorrow.

**Ok Everyone, there is the next chapter. And like I said, the idea for this chappy came from EdwardXD. SO THANX FOR THE IDEA! Just to let everyone know, it may be a while until I update. I haven't been feeling my best, so I hope u all can forgive me! :D. Like always, Please please please review! They are very much appreciated. Thank you for reading this fanfic! :D Peace and Love!**


	15. Child Care

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or its characters! Unfortunately.**

**A/N-Real fast, I want to say sorry to 60s VegVamp, who gave me the idea that the Home Ec. class should do a sewing unit. I just couldnt think of many funny things to happen with that. So sorry!**

**Child Care**

**Previously**_**:**__"Umm, Mrs. Blake.." I said._

_"What do you want Emmett? What?"_

_"I just wanted to say I'm sorry, and it was an honest mistake. I also wanted to come back and help you clean this up."_

_"You want to help fix the kitchen back up?"_

_"Yeah, Im very very sorry."_

_"Ok Emmett, but if you do anything stupid one more time, you are kicked out of my class. Understood."_

_"Yes ma'am."_

_"Good. Now you can start sweeping over there." She pointed towards the blackest part of the kitchen._

_As I was sweeping, I couldn't help but wonder what was in store for tomorrow._

**(Emmett's POV)**

_"Oh man, today was a long day. Especially having to clean that kitchen! Who knew burning up a batch of cookies would lead to destruction." _I thought as I drove home in my jeep. I could not believe that Mrs. Blake hadn't assigned me to detention after that. But then again..it was an honest mistake.

I pulled up to the mansion in record time, and hesitantly went through the door, knowing that the family already knew about my 'kitchen incident' thanks to Alice's vampire power of seeing the future. Great.

"EMMETT!!" Esme yelled. "How in the world did you manage to blow up the entire kitchen? And you were only baking COOKIES for heavens sake!"

"Sorry Es. We forgot to set the timer, and well...BOOM! The kitchen was black. that is what happened."

"Emmett..you stupid vampire...you did help clean up? Right?"

"Yes I did."

"Phsychotic vampire. Cant even bake cookies." I heard a small mousy voice say from behind me.

I ran at my super duper vampire speed and swept Bella up into my arms, called for Rosalie, and went outside.

"E-e-emmett..Where are you taking me?" Bella managed to ask.

"Oh, Rose and I just wanna play a game with you."

"And what is that?"

"Mm...catch the Human."

"EDWAAAAARD!" Bella screamed. "SAAAAAVE MEEEEE!"

"No can do little innocent human. Im blocking my thoughts as well as Rose, and he cant read your thoughts, so...you are all alone. Muaahahahaha!"

"Hey Emmett. Bella." Rose greeted, scaring the crap out of me.

"Rose, don't do that. You know I hate it when you sneak up on me like that."

"Whatever. So, where are we gonna play at?" She asked.

"The forest. Come on Bella. Dont be like this, we wont hurt you."

"I dont...CARE!" Bella squealed, trying to squirm her way out of my grasp.

"Ah, here we are. Come on Bells! Come on Rose!" I yelled, as I tossed Bella into the air.

This game went on for about 10 or 15 minutes with Bella puking only once. All over Rose too, which was hilarious. But then there was a low, fierce growl behind me.

"Put. Her. Down. Emmett." Edward snarled, baring his pearl white teeth.

"Aww, come on Eddie, have some fun. We arent hurting her."

"Then why is puke all over Rose?"

"Oh, that. Well...Umm...Bells must be getting the flu."

"I highly doubt that. Put her down."

I did as I was told, with great sadness, but also fear. I hate it when Eddie acts like this.

"Go home Emmett."

"Fine. Come on Rose." I said, with a pout."

**(Edward's POV)**

I was out hunting, when I heard a mere fraction of Rose's thoughts. Catch. That only meant one thing. My darling Bella was going to be posing as a ball for my idiotic brother and sister so they could play catch.

I hurried to a nearby stream, and tried to wash my face as well as I could, eliminating the mountain lion blood I had been drinking. After I was somewhat decent enough to go into town, I ran at vampire speed towards the forest.

There, between two very large oak trees, was Emmett, and Rosalie tossing Bella around as if she were a rag doll. I crept up right behind Emmett, scaring him to death (No pun intended). He tried telling me that Bells was getting the flu, but its pretty easy to tell when Emmett is lying. After he left I went over to Bella.

"Shhh. Bella, its ok now. You're safe." I said as I cradeled her trembling body. The poor thing was shaking like a leaf. Ugh..I am going to KILL Emmett.

"Thank you Edward." She said.

"Hush. Dont talk."

"Im ok now. I am reallly."

"Hmm.Ok, I guess. But will you just lay here and rest for a while. Please?"

"Ok, as long as I can keep laying in your arms though."

"Fine by me." I said, with a slight chuckle.

She is so beautiful. Laying there, the light reflecting on her face, and making her eyes shine so brilliantly. So beautiful.

"Edward?"

"Yes love?"

"I love you."

"I love you more. Much much more."

With that she came up and kissed my lips, wraping her arms around my neck. Ugh, why does she do this. She smells so wonderful, and yet she keeps tempting my sanity by doing this. Of course I give in.

I grab her waist and pull her closer to my chest, and trailed my mouth down to her neck, which I nestled softly, sending Bella's heart insane. With that, she tried to deepen the kiss, which I, of course, let her do.

Her hands trailed up my neck to my hair, which she grabbed furiously.

"Bella...behave." I whisper into her ear, knowing full well what she was up to.

"Aww Edward. Come on."

"No, I will kiss you, but do not try to convince me to do anything else."

"Fine, Ill behave."

"Good." And that was where we lay for who knows how long.

**(Emmett's POV: The next day)**

_"Ugh, another day of Summer Scool. Great! Nothing like this. NOT!"_

I ran out of the house, not wanting to be late again, and got in my jeep.

I got to school very quickly, which is how the rest of the day went. Quickly. Well, that is except for Home Ec. Of course.

"Good morning class." Mrs. Blake greeted in a very quiet voice. "Seeing as how a few of us have some cooking issues, I thought that we would just jump over to child care."

There were some groans, and some cheers. But mostly, everyone was quiet.

"Starting tomorrow, you all are going to be taught what to feed an infant, how to change a diaper, and what is safe for a child and what is not. Right now, I am going to hand out a piece of paper to everyone, and it will either say boy or girl on it. Whichever gender you have, you must bring in a child or baby doll of that gender. Now here comes the papers."

_"OMIGOSH!! This will be soooo much fun! And I know exactly who to bring. MUAAHAHAHAHA!"_

**Ok guys, I am SOOOOO Sorry it took so long to update. I am sooo busy and now that it is the end of summer, I am going to be having practices to go to in the evenings, and the days are busy. I am sooo sorry, but I do have one request. I do not mind at all if your reviews say update soon. But DO NOT send me PMs telling me to update. I usually reply to PMs, But I WILL NOT reply to PMs telling me to update. I hate to be rude, but I am very busy, and it's hard for me to update these days. (Especially when Breaking Dawn comes out. Then, all my time, well...time that i have...will be spent on that book. lol. Anyways, I hate to be mean...but the updating is going to be longer and Im very very sorry. Hope you like the chapter, and if anyone is mad about this request, or has problems do not hesitate to PM me. Thank you everyone! :D **

**Peace and Love. (Oh yeah, I LOVE reviews. lol)**


	16. Kidnapp

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters...Yet. Muahahaha. lol.**

**A/N: Okay, I got the idea for this from TwilightVolleyBall9...They know what the idea is, but if I tell everyone else...it wont be a surprise. So you will just have to read the chapter. lol. :D So..THANK YOU TWILIGHTVOLLEYBALL9!**

**Kidnapp!**

**(Emmett POV 9:00 PM)**

_"Omigosh, this is just _too_ perfect. Good thing Edward it hunting, but what about Alice. Hmmm. Well...Maybe she will be a good sport about it. Ill talk to her."_

_"This plan is GENIUS! I wonder why I had never thought of it before. Uh oh. I feel a bad guy song coming on. Muahahaha. Da da da duuuuunnn. Da da da dunnn. dadada dun dadada dun DADADA DUN!! Hahahaha! This plan is soo perfect. Now all I have to do is find Alice. Oooh there she is."_

"Aaaaliiiice! I need a favor from you!" I replied in a sing song kind of voice.

"What is it now Emmett? Omigosh. You arent gonna blow something up again...are you?"

"No no no. Nothing like that. But it is a secret." I said as I leaned down to her tiny ear.

I whispered my plan to her, and as I explained, a small, but evil..very evil..smile started to form on her lips.

"That is genius Emmett..I love it. But how are you gonna be able to accomplish that?"

"Watch."

I walked away from Alice, and headed up the stairs into Edwards bedroom. There she was, breating very heavily...almost snoring. It took everything I had not to laugh. I really never heard a sound like that before. It was funny.

Unfortunately, Bella was unable to get the makeup that Alice had put on her off. She somewhat looks like a clown. Hahahaha. Bella the clown. Thats kinda funny.

_"No! No, back to buisness Emmett. No goofing around." _I told myself.

I quietly leaned over the bed, and gently picked up my favorite human, and made a quick dash for my jeep.

When I got there, I laid Bella on the backseats, and hopped into the front. I had no idea where I was going, or what my whole plan was...but I did have the supplies I needed. Duct tape, rope, a hair ribbon, and...a bib. Muahahahaha.

**Ok guys. I dont know if that was a good cliffy or not. But doesnt a writer have to put one it somewhere? Well, sorry its soo short, but I will try to update again...umm...hopefully tomorrow. If not..then...probably sunday. Cuz tomorrow i gotta babysit, Friday I have to clean and my friend is spending the night, and we are going to the store hopefully at midnight to buy breaking dawn. And then, saturday will be spent reading. So...sorry if I take a very long time to update. Hope you arent too mad. lol. BYE!  
**


	17. AU NEED TO READ! VERY IMPORTANT

**A/U: Ok so so sorry bout the wait guys! Thx for putting up w/ me. ****BUT PLEASE NO MORE PMS TELLING ME TO UPDATE!! ****I hate sounding mean, but i have asked this before, and hopefully this is the last time. School is starting, and u cant believe the homework! I also have band practice every tuesday and thursdays from 5:00 P.M to 8:00 PM. Then fridays Im going to start having football games that is required to go to for band. I understand some of you love this story and want more, i understand that..but i dont need emails saying "Come on its been a month already". I Know that already. Thank you to those of you who are patient with me. My friend has been going through a hard time..and well frankly my personal life comes first. So...PLEASE PLEASE no more pms rushing me. I dont care if u put Something like "please update soon" in your reviews. I LOVE THAT! It shows me that people actually like what I wrote. Once again i hate sounding mean, and im sure most of you understand where im coming from (Especially you fellow high schoolers). Please please tell me if you are upset w/ this A/U, and dont agree. Hopefully we can work something out w/ my INCREDIBLY busy schedule. Thanks for your understandment, now...Im gonna go update "Emmett goes to summer school" **


	18. Bella Goes to School

**Disclaimer: I do not own twilight! :( lol. **

**Bella goes to school**

**(Bella's POV)**

"mm." I mumble as I start to awake. Hmm. I wonder where Edward could be. I try opening my mouth to say somthing, but couldnt.

_"What the heck?"_ I ask myself. I try to open my eyes, but couldnt do that either. All there was was blackness..as if...NO! I couldnt be!

I WAS KIDNAPPED!! AAAHH!

_"Who in the world would do this to m.. Emmett."_

I start kicking my feet against something soft and leathery. The couch..and chair?

"Shhh Bella Shh. Its ok..I wont do anything to you." said a voice that sounded quite like Emmett's.

Thats when I felt the fabric come loose from my eyes, and something peel off my mouth. Yep..it was Emmett..stupid stupid Emmett.

"Emmett..WHAT THE HELL!" I scream. "GET ME OUT OF HERE NOW!!"

"Bells, just calm down. I did this 'cause I have to pass Home Ec., and your the only one who can help me."

"Why do you need my help..is that a baby bonnett on my head?"

"Yes..it is. I needed to bring in either a fake baby..or a live one."

"Emmett. I swear I'm going to have Edward KILL you."

"My my my. Such anger. OOOOHHH! I KNOW WHY! I KNOW WHY!"

"Why Emmett? Take a guess?"

"THE HUMAN IS HUNGRY!! YEP! I knew it..the human is hungry..good thing I brought these doughnuts."

"NO I AM NO..did you say doughnuts?"

"Mmm hmm. Fresh from the bakery. Along with milk."

"What kind of doughnuts?"

"Ooohh, just some chocolate longjohns, jelly doughnuts, and some glazed twists."

Oh man, why did Emmett have to know that Chocolate long johns were my absoulute favorite.

"Fine, I'll have two chocolate long johns, and twist and half a jelly doughnut."

"Pig." Emmett said under his breath as he handed me my requests.

"Stupid unreliably vampire" I shot back.

"Ok there are more doughnuts by you if you want them. Along with a chicken salad sandwich for lunch. Ill be back in about five hours. Kay? kay. bye."

_"FIVE HOURS!" _I hope he knows Im not a vampire. I am able to die of boredom.

**(5 Hours later)**

"Come on Bella, hurry up! We have to get to home Ec."

"Mmmkay. Just a little longer." I said.

"No! Wake up, or else we'll be late."

"No."

"yes."

"No"

"YES!"

"Fine fine..im up im up."

"YAY! Ok for now your name will be.."

"Uh..Bella?"

"No no. It needs to be a little girls name. Hmm. Belly."

"Ew. no. I dont like it."

"So what, your a baby."

I just roll my eyes.

"Now, Hop up in my arms...so i can carry you into the room."

Since I had just woken up, I was too tired to rebell. So, I did as I was told.

Once we walked into the classroom, all eyes were on me..then that horrible horrible sound.

The sound of Mike Newton's nasaly laugh, followed by a snort. Then the whole class fell into harmony with him.

**Ok guys. I may or may not be giving this story to a different author. I just cannot think of any more ideas for this one. But I do have another story brewing in my head..so do not fear. lol. If I do pass the story on, I will be sure to let you know. Remember what I said in the AU note..NO MORE PMS RUSHING ME. Please guys...please please PLEASE review. If u do...well..I'll give ya a cookie. lol. Peace and Love! :D**


	19. AN

**A/N**

**Ok guys, Its gettin REAL slim w/ the reviews. So, i was gonna update, but since I only had two or three reviews..Im not going to. I dont know if its cuz of the authors note in the last chapter or what..but if u like this story..REVIEW! If you dont, I wont know if people read this story or not, and its silly to write something no one reads. so PLEASE REVIEW!! It will be a while until i can update again..maybe a week. idk. but PLEASE review...PLEASE! If u do, ill give ya a cookie! Oh, and one more thing..THANK YOU TO THE THREE OF YOU WHO REVIEWED! IT WAS GREATLY APPRECIATED! :D ALSO THANK YOU TO THOSE WHO READ MY STORY..that is if anyone does..idk. Well...like i said..REVIEW! **

**Peace and Love! :D **

**(Oh yeah..no flames please, if you have a problem, PM me about it. Thank you.)**


	20. AU NOTE MUST READ!

Authors note 2.

Hey guys! I no I no. I need to update. Lol. Well…here is the thing. TONIGHT OUR HIGH SCHOOL BAND WON SECOND PLACE IN THE GOLD POSITION!! AND IT WAS OUR FIRST COMPETITION. Our color guard won first, drum majors won first, we placed first in visuals, and tied for second for sound quality! Guys, this is huge, cuz we were two points away from beating the band who placed first! TWO! SO, im gonna b sooooo busy with getting everything in our show cleaned up (well, my part anyway!) and so I have no time at all for this story. My school comes first, especially band. Like….tonight was my very first competition and we did that well…im BURSTING with pride, and trying not to cry. Lol lol. So..here is the thing. If any of u want to finish the story (u have to tell me ur ideas), PM me and I'll choose one of u to hand it off to. Because like I said…band comes first for me. SO thank you to all who read this I luv u guys sooo much (in a non freaky way). Thank you for understanding! And thank you for reading guys! :D PEACE!

Love, TF01


	21. Last Author's note

**The Last Authors note**

Ok guys..I know it has been a VERY long time, and I'm sooo sorry, but unfortunately this fanfic is gonna have to end now.  I no u all hate me, but I have no more ideas, and nobody wants to finish up the story for me. So, I will ask one more time, will someone who likes this fanfic finish it up for me? (If u have any ideas that is..good ones). I will give you two days, but after that, I will take the story off. Thanks for reading everyone! I heart u all! 


	22. School Days

**AN: Ok guys, since all of u are BEGGING me to finish up; I guess I will…BUT I need at least 15 reviews. Please? It may make me write faster. Lol :D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight…unfortunately. ******

**School Days**

_Previously: Once we walked into the classroom, all eyes were on me…then that horrible sound, the sound of Mike Newton's nasally laugh, followed by a snort. Then the whole class fell into harmony with him._

**(Bella's POV)**

"Is…that...you…Bella?" Mike asked between hysterics.

"No you dummy!" Emmett shot "it's Izzybelly. Her name now is Izzybelly."

"IT IS BELLA! Omigosh Bella? Why did you let him do that to you?" Mike asked.

"Well, he said for his project he needed a young child, and since we don't know anyone, I agreed to play the part." I said, trying to hide my face as well as I could.

"Emmett is such a loser. He couldn't even find a two year old child." Mike sneered.

"I SWEAR NEWTON I WILL…" Emmett began, but was cut off by the Home Ec. Teacher.

"Settle down, settle down. Now, seeing as it is our last day together, until next year that is, we will just spend the whole day introducing the youngsters and playing activities with them." Announced Mrs. Blake.

At this point, Emmett was literally bouncing up and down in his seat from excitement...EDWARD! Of all days he had to be hunting, why today…why?

"Now who would like to go first?" The old teacher asked.

"OOH ME, ME, MEEEEE!" Emmett cried.

"Anyone _else _want to volunteer?" Mrs. Blake asked "Anyone?"

"We all would really like to see Cullen's ummm…_little_ friend." Mike stated.

"YESSSS!" Shouted Emmett at the top of his lungs. "Okay everyone. This is Izzybelly, and she is my uhh…cousin. Yep, and I…"

"Cut the act, we all know it's Bella." Someone shouted.

"NOOO ITS IZZYBELLY!" Emmett offendedly screamed at the crowd. "Now, as I was saying. Izzybelly and I are like two peas in a pod. I do everything with her."

"No kidding." I mumbled low enough so only Emmett could hear.

"What activities do you enjoy playing with your umm…cousin?" Mrs. Blake enquired.

"Oh, puzzles, cooking, going to the park, and most of all…COLORING! Izzybelly loves to color? Dontcha? _Dontcha?"_ Emmett asked me in a cooing voice.

"Mm hmm." I murmured.

"Bella, I swear if you don't play along I will throw you out of so many windows, Edward would have to put me in a funny farm!" He whispered in my ear, so only I could hear.

"So, Emmett…can you show us anything you learned about younger children?" Mrs. Blake asked.

"Of course I can. With Izzybelly, I learned almost everything there is towards caring for a younger child just as she."

No kidding, I'm younger by like…70 some odd years. I snickered at that thought.

"Ok, well, since you know so much, why not show us something… like changing a DIAPER!" Mike replied.

"Pppshh…that's simple."

"What are you DOING?" I asked him in a very loud whisper.

"Just play along. Oh, and don't worry, I'm not gonna make you pull your pants off. That's one thing I will not do to my brother. I know very well not to give Mike that enjoyment…or do I?" He asked, eyeing me.

"Emmett Cullen, I swear if you do that, I will kill you. May not be today, but sooner or later…"

All he did to that was roll his eyes and laughed a short laugh.

"Ok, as I was saying," Emmett began, "diaper changing is a very simple, yet messy process. Especially with little Izzybelly. The poor thing cannot manage to wait to pee again until the next diaper is on. That of course, results in urine all over the floor, which angers my mother terribly."

EDWARD, EDWARD, EDWARD! I screamed in my head.

"Now, here I will _show_ you the process. And no, unfortunately mike, you will not see her depantsed **(I have no idea how to spell that)** today."

I actually though I saw Mike look down, as if disappointed…EEEWWW!

At this point, Emmett was reaching into the pink and purple diaper bag he had brought along.

"What you do is, unfold the diaper like so…and if you absolutely have to, tie down the babies arms."

Tie the baby's arms down? They would have to be insane…but then again this was Emmett, and that was exactly what he was doing to me. WHERE ARE YOU EDWARD?! Omigosh, he is actually putting a diaper on me. Help, help, help. I would have run, but the stupid vampire had to be smart for once and tie me down.

"Now you slide the diaper under the bottom, like so. Pull the front up, and tape the tabs together…and WOLA! The diaper process is done." Emmett exclaimed.

There I was in a diaper, face red from humiliation in front of all my classmates. How worse can this get.

"And your baby may get a little cranky, but don't fear, all you need is a good pacifier and your set." Emmett said while sticking a binky into my mouth.

I was wrong…dead wrong. The binky made it ten times worse. Thankfully Emmett decided to do a little dance while singing a spice girls song which took some of the attention off of me, but not much. I cannot wait to get out of here…when it is going to…

"**EMMETT!!!!!!"** Yelled a very out of breath person. "**YOU WILL DIE!"**

I was finally saved.

**(Yep, I was gonna end it there. BUUUT, since I'm so, so nice…lol…I won't. So here is the next chappy! ENJOY!)**

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Edward was breathing heavily out of his nostrils, while pinching the bridge of his nose so hard, I actually though it would fall off.

"What. Are. You. DOING?" He asked furiously.

"Umm…well you see big brother…I was just taking Bella to school for show and tell. But, I needed a child, so I thought…" Emmett started

"That you would take my precious, beautiful Bella and use her as a DUMMY?!" Edward finished.

"Uh…yeah." Grinned Emmett.

Edward, still tightly pinching his nose, calmly said six full words to Emmett

"You have five minutes to run."

Emmett, naturally, leaped over a desk and bolted out of the door.

After standing for a few minutes, Edward said,

"Bella, I'm so sorry I wasn't here earlier to save you, but traffic was unbelievable…cops everywhere too. But right now I have some unfinished business to attend to, " Edward stated while ripping the diaper off of me, taking the binky out of my mouth, and giving me a sweet, yet appetizing kiss on the mouth. "and I promise you I will not leave your side for the rest of the night. And now, I say goodbye to you…for now." With that Edward too, bolted out of the door just as Emmett had done.

About five to ten minutes later, you could hear a faint, high pitched squeal in the background. Finally, Emmett was getting what he deserved…a _talking to_ with Edward. And with that, I headed out of the classroom, to Emmett's jeep (ha ha ha) and drove back home.

**THE END**

**AU (Okey dokey everyone, I finished the story. Please, please, please review…it would make me very very happy. ******** Also, I want to thank all of my loyal readers…since there are too many to say, it's everyone who has reviewed for every chapter. I also give a HUGE shout out to Walkinginblue for the idea of putting Bella into a diaper…THANK YOU! Now, if you liked this story, please please check out my one shot "A pet for Emmett". For some reason it will not come up in the search bar, so you may have to go to my profile to read it. Thank you so much again for reading! And please be sure to review. Peace everyone!**

**~TF01 **


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